How to Use Anger for Good

Recently, I received some frustrating news and I’ll admit, my first reaction was to get angry and start to respond full of snark, potentially destroying a relationship. Luckily, I thought better of it and decided to talk myself out of firing off an angry email.

So how can we honor the emotions we feel and yet not let them control us? I can’t tell you I have all the answers, but I think a good first step is to pause. Just…wait….for a moment and breathe through it. Feel the emotions without reacting to them and then realize you can choose how to respond. That right there is powerful and especially important if we feel like we are a victim of someone’s actions.

OK, so what’s next? Well, if you’re anything like me, you then decide to just seethe for a bit and complain to anyone who will listen! But what does that do for you? Does it make you feel better? I know I certainly don’t feel any better! I start to revel in the victimhood and feel worse!  I’m reminded of one of the Keller Williams training course, BOLD, laws “complaining = garbage magnet.”

I’m not a fan of “The Secret” and the idea that you can magically manifest what you want by thinking positively and doing nothing. I do believe that like attracts like and our brains adore patterns. As soon as you start complaining, everything else seems terrible too. And guess what? You attract other complainers! So complaining just leads to more complaining and puts you on a downward spiral.

So what can we do that’s more effective? I think the answer is we look for the lesson. We look for something we could do going forward to prevent it from happening again. Is there some way to take the lesson and even benefit from it? Can you maybe help others avoid it? Is it a wakeup call to make a change? It may not make everything all sunshine and roses for you, but it might just make some lemonade.

 

 

 

 

200 W Franklin St, Bound Brook, NJ

What a day! It may have been freezing outside (literally) but Spring has sprung in Real Estate land!  We had an Open House for this beautiful home today and I had my doubts about how many people would show up on a freezing cold day AND the day after Daylight Saving spring forward madness, but the house hunters turned up in droves!

This beauty is a 3 bedroom/ 2 bathroom colonial in Bound Brook, NJ listed at $315,000. It’s not in a flood zone and does not require flood insurance. It has a large beautiful back yard, full basement, and a full walkup attic. Plus, the neighbors I’ve met are SUPER nice!

If you’re sad you missed the Open House, don’t be! Contact me for a private showing 850-889-3239.

Anyway, if you’re wondering where I’ve been lately, well, I mostly post on my Facebook page as it’s so fast and easy and I’ve been busy, busy! I’m going to try to post on here more often, though.

If you’re curious what the glamorous lifestyle of a Realtor NOT on HGTV looks like, here’s a sample of what my weekends look like:

 

Annnd…

 

 

Looks like fun, no?  Actually, it is! If you like meeting people and helping people, a career in real estate might be for you! If not, well, that’s OK too. It’s not for everyone and there are crazy people out there like me that enjoy it so we can help people like you out!

Oh! But one other awesome thing about real estate? We get to pet the neighborhood pets that come to greet us!

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Anyway, as I said before, I’ll try to post on here more. And it won’t all be about real estate, either! Let me know if you have any questions for me! I’m happy to help. 🙂

 

1820 Middlebrook Rd

What a great way to welcome in winter! I had an open house for a lovely old home (built in 1898) in Bound Brook Sunday. It’s 6 Bedrooms, 4 Full Bathrooms, 2 Half Bathrooms, full of historic charm and selling for $595,000.

As I was putting my open house signs in the ground the morning of the event, the first snow of the season began to fall. (I should point out it  actually started the night before but was melted by the time most folks woke up.)  I stopped to take a video. I’m sorry, it wasn’t planned, so it’s a little rough, but it gives you an idea what it’s like to live in this beautiful area during the holidays.

 

I have a special place in my heart for this home. If you or anyone you know wants a grand home and has the budget to renovate, this could be their dream home!

 

It’s built on just over 4 acres of land, with central air, a BRAND NEW septic tank and original log beams, stone fireplace, and hardwood floors. It even has a butler’s pantry with a dishwasher AND a dish dryer. My two favorite parts about the home are the steam sauna on the 3rd floor and the screened in porch off of the master bedroom. The large living room with the fireplace and the regal stone terrace in front don’t hurt, either.

 

 

 

Open House – 215 Lenox Place

Hey guys! The open house is over, but this lovely home is still on the market! $330,000 for a 3 bedroom/2 bathroom home in Franklin Township, NJ. Feel free to contact me if you’d like to schedule a showing! Heather@HeatherRhoden.com

Where I’ve Been Lately

So it’s been a few months since I’ve posted last. It’s been an incredible adventure involving climbing actual mountains as well as mental ones.

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In Iceland summiting my first mountain! I’ve done tons of hikes with scrambles, but this one involved some super intense and technical scrambling to get to the rocky and windy top. – http://www.PhotoKirk.net

 

In June it was Germany for my boyfriend’s family celebrations and then Italy where we had delicious Brunello di Montalcino wine, made with the lush Sangiovese grape, paired with freshly shaved truffles on everything. Simply divine!

 

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Freshly shaven truffles made their appearance at every meal.

After being back for a few weeks I found myself in Portland, Oregon. The waterfalls and mossy green surroundings are just beautiful! While I was there, I had a lot of time to think. Things were great, but something was off. I was juggling too many things at once and something had to give. Well, actually it turned out to be a few things.

 

You see, I believe in being fully present. I believe in giving 100% to whatever your current focus is. I also believe in course-corrections. Sometimes it’s harder to explain the change of direction to others than it is to actually make the change itself. And yet, being true to oneself is so very important. After all, it’s your life. Only you can decide what’s best for you.

 

So  I took Oprah’s advice and got “very still.” I asked myself what was it that I’d do if I wasn’t afraid? What opportunity had I thought of that always got shot down out of fear of failure? And then, just as I’ve encouraged you to do, I started. I took one baby step, then another, and then a giant leap! I can tell you I don’t regret it!

 

Shortly afterwards, I hopped on a plane to Iceland with my boyfriend, Kevin. We rented an RV and drove around the entire Island in 17 days. It was incredible! Iceland is a rugged and wild country, with friendly people, majestic waterfalls at every turn, and beautiful horses just waiting for you to stop and pet (read: feed) them. I’m in love! As soon as I got back I started planning our next Iceland adventure!

 

If you like hiking and nature, you absolutely have to go. You won’t be alone, though!  It’s hugely popular with Americans and Germans, but the further from the Golden Circle you get, the more remote and wild it is. If you’re a photographer, what the heck are you doing NOT going? It’s a photographer’s paradise!

 

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About 1/3 into our 16k (~10 mile) hike in Thorsmurk. The best hike we’ve ever done. Super challenging as well.

 

I made sure to plan all our evening stops at the most beautiful place I could find for star/ Aurora Borealis photos. We went in September and every clear night we saw the northern lights! (Of course, it was only 5 out of 17 days…)

 

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The Kirkjufell mountain. A truly iconic mountain in Iceland. We had to take a gravel road here that should have taken us about an hour but ended up taking is 3 hours because it was in such poor condition. We missed sunset here but we got the Aurora!

 

I will warn you, though, that they have changed their laws about camping recently. You can no longer just camp anywhere. However, we found there are a lot of campsites and frankly, if you’re in the middle of nowhere, no one cares, anyway. The closer to the Golden Circle you are, the more knocks you’ll get on the door at 10pm telling you to leave. Of course, midnight is when the stars are out so if you just explain you’re taking star photos and they see all your gear, they should leave you alone.

 

Let me know if you have any questions about driving around Iceland. I learned a lot on this trip and I’d be happy to help you avoid some of the struggles we had. And now, more pictures from Iceland courtesy of my incredibly talented boyfriend, Kevin. (You can find his page and and even order prints at http://www.PhotoKirk.net  All these pictures belong to him.)

 

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Our tour guide put this hat and puffin on my head. What’s a girl to do but go with it and smile! Puffins are so cute!
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I even got to hold a baby puffin! They’re so FLUFFY!
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Harpa Concert Hall in Reykjavik. It’s right on the water and the lights change color over time. The blue is my favorite.
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Iceland is known for it’s hotdogs. Their meat is totally free-range and so good. It’s a blend of lamb, beef, and pork. I love the crunchy onion topping
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Puffins in the wild in the Westman Islands. (Yes, Iceland the island has other smaller islands) They are so clumsy and cute!
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One of the thousands of waterfalls we saw. Seriously, THOUSANDS! This was one of the most impressive, though. It’s called Seljalandsfoss. I was still in the RV sleeping when he took this pic. LOL
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This was off of a horrible gravel road that (non 4×4) rental vehicles are not allowed to go on. We had to park at a farmer’s house and ask for permission first and then walk 2 miles (both ways) to this. It was worth it though. The water is so impossibly blue and we had it all to ourselves! (A rarity now that Iceland is so popular)
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I was driving the RV in the middle of nowhere and Kevin made me pull over when we saw this. Just beautiful!
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This waterfall isn’t very tall but it’s super long. This is just a small impressive subsection of it. The water is super blue here too. It’s called the Hraunfossar.
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Part of the Hraunfossar zoomed in. Fall was just beginning so we saw some beautiful colors towards the end of our trip.
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This was our last evening and our last waterfall in Iceland. It was rainy and cloudy all day but it cleared up just enough for a nice, dramatic sunset picture. I can’t get over how blue the water was here. It looks fake but I assure you it truly looks that blue. It’s called Bruarfoss.
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And because I love it, here’s the Bruarfoss again at a different angle. Truly majestic!

Great Stretch for Long Days at the Computer

Hey, guys! As a former swimmer, I’m used to my traps being tight at the slightest hint of stress. This isn’t a traditional yoga stretch, but it’s one I learned in the course of my yoga teaching. You can do this in a chair or standing, but I like to add it in my yoga classes while sitting in easy pose. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Try this at your own risk. Please remember to listen to your body. If you have an injury, especially to your neck or back, please don’t do this. If you feel sharp, stabbing pain, mild to major discomfort, numbness or tingling please stop immediately! If you are new to exercise, please consult with your doctor before trying this.

What Makes You Happy?

 

Recognizing What Makes You Happy

You know it’s easy to say “do more of what makes you happy” and that’s not necessarily bad advice. The world would probably be a more peaceful place if we did that. But this means different things to different people.  For some, it means $83,000 a year in income, for others, it’s a sleeping kitten, or an amazing trip to an exotic location. Maybe for you, it’s all the above and then some. Most of us have long lists of things that make us happy.

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Happiness 

But what if you don’t really know what makes you truly happy? What if you have a long list of things that bring you momentary joy, but you still feel like something is off or missing?  

Well, I can’t tell you what will make you happy, but I can tell you the best way I’ve found to determine that for myself is to be a great caretaker of myself, set healthy boundaries, and to identify and live in line with my values. Maybe that sounds complicated or too “new agey” but it’s really not. 

The key is to really start to listen to your inner voice. Understand that that having needs and desires is healthy, it’s how we respond to them (or don’t) that can be unhealthy. Take the time to get to know yourself and how certain things, situations, people make you feel. What gives you a feeling of lightness rather than a heavy feeling? What kinds of stories restore your faith in humanity? What makes you feel nurtured and cared for?

When you start to answer these questions, you’re on the path to discovering and living in-line with your values. See if that doesn’t make your attitude a little bit brighter. 

Thanks for reading! What are your top 3 items on your list of what makes you happy? Leave me a comment bellow!